How Blogging Made Me a Nicer Person


WARNING:  this post is a rant, partly sarcastic, and could appear rude to some – read at your own risk.  and try not to hate me; i’m still struggling to become nicer ;-)

The past Nisha used to be picky and brutally critique, though intentions were always only to improve myself or others.  But ever since I started blogging, a lot has changed the way I write and respond.  Part of it is because of what I see others do.  That doesn’t mean I do what people do.  I can’t be preaching “dare to be different” if I don’t follow it myself.  But the present Nisha has changed and how!

Let me give you a few scenarios of some food blogs I’ve come across and comments some  bloggers usually write:

Scenarios: 
a blogger posts a picture of the dish so zoomed in you can’t even tell what it is, OR 
a blogger uploads a picture of dish either so blurry or so bright you’d get a headache, OR 
a blogger posts picture of a dish that obviously looks overcooked and almost burnt...

comments from fellow bloggers? picture looks great, dish looks inviting, i’m drooling on my keyboard, looks amazing, looks mouthwatering, you’ve made it perfectly, can’t take my eyes away, looks tempting... {and trust me, half of them don't even read the post a blogger puts so much effort in writing}

Scenarios:
a blogger has really weird font/color on a color background making everything too hard to read, OR
a blogger goes on, and on, and on, and on about something random and unrelated, OR 
a blogger keeps writing half a page about weather in every other post, OR 
a blogger inscribes utilizing lexis you merely encounter in GRE manuscripts {translate: a blogger writes using words you only find in GRE books}...

comments from fellow bloggers? you have a wonderful blog, great post, good post, interesting post, wow you made this despite the adverse conditions, hats off to you...

And that is how I also have learned to motivate, encourage, and appreciate everyone, no matter what I really think in the back of my mind.  And then I try to leave meaningful, encouraging comments on any blog I visit, aiming to be nicer and less critical.

But several times I’ve wondered what will happen if one day everyone writes their true, real, honest opinion (with constructive criticism) without any fake, sugary-sweet words?  And what if everyone takes it with a positive spirit too?  Or what would the past Nisha have said?
~ ‘those unnecessary stories were boring and a waste of time, you could have tried relating to it or at least make it sound interesting?’
~ ‘hey if you switch off flash next time, the photos could look better.  i learned this pretty late myself..’
~ ‘dude, you are cooking and blogging in this heat/snow coz YOU want to; not coz you’re forced to, so repeating about cooking in bad weather and no electricity consistently isn’t heroic’
~ ‘er...you could have cooked the dish again and clicked again instead of posting pictures of burnt or blurry food...’
~ ‘hmmm.  sky will not fall down if you don’t send an entry in time to a food event/blogging marathon you know?’

Okay, I think those were more rude than constructive.  But my point is – even though I know blogging is just a hobby/casual pastime for some, at least with the honest comments a blogger will improve writing and/or photos and have a better blog?  (i’m not saying to become a professional writer or photographer, and i’m not comparing one’s work to another – again, can’t preach what I don’t follow)  And at least with genuine feedback, a blogger will not be under the illusions of artificial, flowery comments some people write?  (bloggers do realize that some people leave comments for the heck of it, or simply for a backlink to theirs & don’t necessarily mean everything they say, yeah?  i have figured, ask me how.)  

Because for all I know, I always look for sincere and honest responses, and meaningful comments to improve myself.  But it’s difficult I know, because in blogosphere, everyone wants to appear nice, otherwise people won’t visit them back.  And because every person leaving a comment on every blog post is a matter of life and death *rolling eyes*, we have to give a good impression.  And because of one negative comment, the whole blog world could go against us, taking the name-calling and war on Facebook pages. (all of this cracks me up, really.)

So, at the beginning of last year when I started this blog, because of writing nice, kind, appreciative comments everywhere even if I didn’t initially mean them, I actually started to feel positive energy inside and outside me.  It confirms that when you do good things everyday, you become a good person.  When you say nice things to yourself in the mirror, you start to believe in it.  When you encourage, motivate, or inspire someone and they feel better, you feel really happy too.  And soon it becomes a habit, and you sincerely start to write favorable comments and replies on blog, and give around compliments in real life too.  You learn to appreciate someone's efforts, no matter how small.  You put up your best self naturally and eventually become a nicer person.

And that is why, even though I have noticed this suspicious behavior in my recent visitor activity since a few months EVERY DAMN DAY from New York and Ireland:

Instead of saying, hey what the fuck is up with that pattern of visit??  I’ll say, thank you for visiting, I’m so glad.

Because blogging made me a nicer person.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

If you’ve reached here, I gotta say thanks for reading this random rant!
I hope this post did not freak you out =D  And before you shy away from commenting on this blog ever again, wait.  Here’s your turn to write an honest opinion - about the post, the blog, or the blogger.  Go ahead, I won’t mind.  It’s now, or never ;-)

61 comments:

  1. honestly.. i liked this post.. many times i ahve felt this... i recently even unfollowed a blog which i had initially in the " being good" period decided to follow.. but then found that this particular person was " marketing" the blog too much.. found that person as a member on every other blog i saw, saw this person begging for more comments openly so taht he/she wud be qualified for a giveaway... and the pics were never good on his/her blog!! i though" y the hell should i follow that blog??" thats it i stopped.. i am not great at photos myself but i try my best and there was this other person who had many many recipes but her pics needed a lot of improvemnet.. the pics were always taken from too close so i politely mailed her cos i dint want to leave acomment which others wud read.. may hurt a persons ego.. i mailed her and i know she has been trying...
    i still consider myself new to teh blogosphere( actove blogging" .. i find it dffcult to just bvisit many other blogs and comment so taht they in turn come to your blog.. i have done that though ( ya even i love to read comments on my blog!!!)bt honestly i felt cheap so nowadys unless i realy like apost or blog i dont comment or follow it..
    BTW, i love ur blog.. and i am happy u wrote this post.. gave me a chance to come out withthis.. sorry for this long reply nisha... had to write it...!! one more confession: there are some blogs which have those extra long posts with those "big words" where u will need the dictionary.. i mostly skip teh post.. reading only teh recipe and seeing the clicks...
    pls leave honest comments on my blog.. will be happy to get them....constructive criticims always welcome!!!!:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. first, these are the kind of comments i like to receive & read. the comments that show someone has read the post and is sharing about oneself too. i like my blogger friends/readers opening up to me the way i do via the posts :)

      second, i wouldn't mind someone being a member on numerous blogs if that person wants to follow/keep track of posts on favorite blogs. but if that person starts copy/pasting comments on each blog or 'marketing' like you said, then that's annoying.

      i'm a beginner in blogging & photography myself, so i can't really criticize others. but some kinds of posts and comments are just out of my understanding!

      thank you for the thumbs up for this post and for all your comments so far, renu, i've appreciated each one!

      Delete
    2. came back here to see other responses and very happy that u liked my reply.. i was a little apprehensive abt writing this long a reply.. but i had to get it out too....:);)

      Delete
    3. hehe. i totally understand ;-)

      Delete
  2. i have to tell u again.. i love this post.. am sharing it wherever possinle...:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A humble thank you, once again :)

      Delete
  3. I liked reading this post...good to see someone speaking her mind here. When I first started blogging i hardly had any idea how to proceed and then started visiting other's blog. I prefered to say what i really felt, good or not so good. sometimes I wanted to share a small tip that worked for me but most of the time it was not liked by others. so i chose the easier path to be nice. with time now i have come to know people who look for meaningful comments and discuss food and recipes beyond comments and ranking. blogging is fun and I love it for its immense creativity and knowledge...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. same here, sayantani! totally agree with you. i too have now filtered out only those bloggers who i know would appreciate my comments, because most of mine get lost somewhere between 'wow, looks good, tempting clicks, etc etc etc'!

      and i don't understand why someone would not want to learn something more with tips from others? blog is a knowledge-sharing platform!

      thank you for your comment :)

      Delete
  4. So funny...I think that the positivity of people's comments have left me a much better, nicer person as well. But really, what IS up with that increase in traffic from Ireland? :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, same goes for me too. And some of the comments just make our day, don't they? :)

      I don't know about that traffic. I hope it's a bot/crawler/spammer. Because a real person with that pattern of visit would have to be weird.

      Delete
  5. I do agree with you.. Honestly, some comments are just for the sake of it..A line that will fit in everywhere and you could copy paste for every damn post on any blog.. It doesn't motivate me..

    But then there are some honest comments that make your day..

    Can u tell me where you see your traffic details.. the snapshot doesn't look like it is from blogger

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Once I found a blogger's comment very strange, so I copy-pasted it on Google and guess what I found? The same comment in about 15 blogs that day. Some people forget internet is a small world!

      It's not from blogger. Sites like statcounter.com, sitemeter.com, etc are to check traffic details. This one's from Statcounter.

      Delete
  6. ha ha - loved reading this post; you know what there are times when I feel not leaving a comment is better than writing wow or such stuff. But like you say all the indifferent comments and the meaningful ones has helped me shape into a reasonably decent person and yes a blogger too ! Keep up the spunk gal

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, as much as I'd love to let the blogger know that I dropped by & read the post...if I don't have anything sensible to write, I don't.

      Thank you for your kind words, Priya! :)

      Delete
  7. Soooo true, honest and bold !!! Whatever I wish to say ,You have already said ,so ab mere kehne ko kuch bacha he nahi,tumhare blog ka he nahi, balki tumhara naam bhi spusht hona chahiye:)love and hugs to you dear:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Main chahti thi ki mera naam kuch meaningful ho, jaise Prerna, Khushi, or something, because main bahot logo ko inspire aur happy karti aayi hoon ... lekin Spusht naam bhi accha idea hai :D

      Thank you, Anjana, for your constant motivation and appreciation! *hugs back*

      Delete
  8. This post is simple, unambiguous and straightforward.. true to your blog description! And thanks for your lovely wishes (hope it was real ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Were definitely real! I read good posts word to word & leave a sincere response :)

      Thanks for your comment!

      Delete
  9. i don't want say "good", "wow" etc. etc. but you wrote real words. sometimes criticism is needed to improve work. but how many people can take that? anyway i love the post, though a little bit rude. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You understood my main point amidst all the rude and sarcastic remarks, that's all I wanted :) Thanks for your feedback, Krishna!

      Delete
  10. Nisha let me say I am guilty of being frank to the point that people consider me a know all. But Iam honest. and this lost me quite afew readers.. it rankles I thought they were friends and there can not be friendship if I cannot be honest, myself.There are many times when my brain and fingers disconnect and the reply may be wow or some thing I am not happy abt but then I mean it is wow. I have never left a comment if i did not like something. If it costs me readers thats okay. I will be honest. I have to live with myself not my readers. It hurts me a lot but then atleast I can say honestly I am honest. Kudos dear it takes a lot of courage to write this post. Let me tell you your honesty has always coem across in your comments. I treasure that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And I used to be frank to the point that people considered me b*tchy, and that's one thing I improved too because of blogging - learned to control my tongue (fingers) and increased my patience level :D

      Like you, I also stand firm by my beliefs. Humble thanks for your kind words, Archana. It did need a little courage, because I was prepared to receive a lot of hateful comments after this post. But I've been really happy to hear from fellow blogger friends how they can relate to what I wrote.

      Delete
  11. Absolutely straightforward...loved reading an honest post. You go girl:)

    ReplyDelete
  12. Lovely. I am not getting much time to read many blogs these days and that is my loss completely. One update on your page and I landed up here to check out. I would say this is what I myself wanted to write some day :-)
    You wrote it so well. Kudos girl.
    Blog world is also just like real world, so you learn real wisdom here. Nothing less. Even those crappy comments from bloggers tell a tale and you get to know what they really are. This is my take away from crap...has been some time here :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're right. It's true we learn a lot in blog world too, either directly or indirectly, about people or things, understanding real or artificial ... okay i must stop :D

      Thanks for appreciating my write-up, Sangeeta, here & your FB message :)

      Delete
  13. i loved this post of yours and i too wanted to write something like this... after blogging for 3 years now, one thing i have sure realised that it is a fake world. everything is cliched. but amidst this fakeness i have made a few genuine blogger friends.

    personally whenever i visit a blog i do read the whole post and comment appropriately. but i have to admit that on rare occasions i am lost and i don't know what to comment in terms of the post or photography.

    even if the photos are not good or too much of close ups... i comment positively. as even i have been there before... even in the beginning i have taken some close up shots. but no blogger would comment then... reason is obvious that i won't comment on other blogs due to a very hectic life lived before... so naturally they also won't comment on mine. but i was least bothered.

    but for a blogger there is lots of scope and creativity that he or she can reach to in terms of cooking, photography & writing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True. We all start somewhere small and gradually improve. And not everyone likes to hear unwanted advice or feedback, so that is why no one comments anything for any improvement. But why even leave artificial praises instead of helping the person grow, is my concern.

      There is definitely no end to learning more, in terms of anything anywhere, for anyone. But when the fake compliments makes someone believe the job was done extraordinarily, it slows down their learning. That's how it works for grown-ups, I feel.

      Thanks for your comment, Dassana. I appreciate you shared your thoughts :)

      Delete
    2. welcome nisha. i do agree with the artificial phrases.... sometimes i myself laugh at these artificial comments. once i opened two-three blogs and showed all the comments to hubby.. we were laughing.

      some blogs with a poor quality blurred pics not even taken from a decent point & shoot camera... and everybody is saying wonderful pics, great pics etc... i was like are this people crazy.... at least you can comment on the recipe or the post if not the pics.

      the touching point is nobody comments constructively to help the people grow. one reason is that we all want to be polite. second reason is we are not bothered. we just comment anything so that the other folks also comment on our blogs. in fact in the virtual words things are not real so are the comments.

      for me most of my genuine comments comes from my visitors who are not bloggers... thankfully.

      i also agree with what radha has to say. when you see recipe that you make everyday eg rotis or dal or sabzi... than what to write... if there are good pics you can say something about the pics.

      Delete
    3. Long back when I showed the comments on some blogs to my nerdy husband, after reading 'looks tempting, looks inviting, etc etc etc' he innocently asked "why so seductive comments?" Haha.

      Non-bloggers write comments with unconditional expectation to follow them back and truly appreciate what really helps them, that's why theirs sounds genuine. But I must say I do have some great blogger friends who leave very sensible and meaningful comments.

      And when I don't have anything nice to say about the post or the picture, I tell something about myself related to it. With the hope that other bloggers also like getting to know their readers better rather than just read wow, nice, etc? :)

      Thanks for coming back!

      Delete
    4. welcome nisha. regarding the last point i exactly do that. i tell something about myself or the way i make the recipe.

      Delete
  14. Hi nisha. How are you? I came to your blog from google plus and your post was shared by a friend of mine. i really loved what you have written. I am not so new and not so old to blogging world but past few weeks I had been feeling same too. I could not understand this at all but your post made me realise this is the reason. I think your rant or words here hold a perfect point. over one year of blogging yes i have improved and still need to improve

    i am going to follow your blog to read more now..

    have a nice day

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for dropping by and for your kind words, Meena. Hope you continue to enjoy reading here :) Good day to you too!

      Delete
  15. Well, this is a blunt post. Quite agree with you on a whole lot of points. But then when we post online we are doing it to get some attention. And some may not be what we want. Comments may not be the kind we like, but then what does one write if it is a recipe that we make everyday or we have seen/eaten better? Virtual world is like the non-virtual world where we need to make some polite comments, smile at those we do not really want to, or invite people who we hope do not take our invitation seriously!! But there are warm people you meet online. Some really useful comments too. And some of them lead you their sites that are really good.
    But my one rant is those who host events and then expect you to put their logo ( and honestly some of them are hideous) on your blog. Why? A roundup with a link would be nice. And it does give you an nice spread of recipes. That should be the main purpose. Anyway, I tried once but then decided I did not want to be a part of events even if I have a recipe to contribute. And believe me I am not a snob!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You've mentioned a lot of good points to think about. For one, when I don't have anything good to say about the post, picture, or recipe - I share something relative about myself or a story or a memory attached to it. The way I like reading the same from my readers, I leave such comments myself instead of only praises all the time (not sure if the other bloggers like it?).

      I agree with that logo point. I have never put any event or award logos on my blog so far. I appreciate people's efforts in creating a logo and for considering me for Versatile Blogger/Liebster/etc award, but I like to keep this space clean. Besides, I always consider what would a non-blogger get out of it? Because that's the main audience who I blog and post for.

      Thanks for your comment, Radha! Loved it.

      Delete
  16. I so agree with you. There are a number of copy-paste comments, but then there are some honest good comments which definitely makes one feel awesome.

    Kudos to you for writing such a spusht post.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, there sure are. And we all can usually tell who is genuine and who is fake :)

      Thank you for appreciating, Rachana!

      Delete
  17. Whenever I visit a blog,I try my best to give a honest comment,after reading the complete post.I totally understand how hard it is to come up with a complete post. As Rachana says,it's always a great feeling to read a comment that comes from the heart :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Same here, because I don't see the point of writing a random comment without reading what the blogger has to share! Unfortunately, not many people do that and it's quite obvious. But that's okay. I have no complains. (I keep forgetting I'm a nicer person now, hehe :P)

      Delete
  18. oh how u mirror my thoughts nisha! reading this was like a breath of fresh air... although i cannot be outright rude & say mean things (afterall the person did go thru some effort to write/photograph) but sometimes i do catch myself thinking "cant they see how unreadable the neon-green font is against the black background?!". Also i somehow dont see the point of taking part in events & marathons (find it all quite lame to be honest) very few are interesting enough to make me wanna participate, im sure i have better things to do in life. Have been quite busy lately and usually just read ur posts but this one made me comment :) keep the honest posts coming

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's exactly what I thought when I used to read about marathons & melas - I really have better things to do & too many commitments to even think about posting every day. But you know what's worse? When it sounds like what a life-and-death situation it was for the blogger to post something before the due date or when they write what crime they did by not sending their post in time. Trust me, I've read some like those :D

      Events, I don't mind too, because some of them make you want to search for ideas and try something new. At least for a lazy bum like me.

      Thanks for your comment, darling. I've missed seeing your around!

      Delete
  19. If I had to comment on this post, it would be another post altogether;-) I have been thinking about all of what you said and thought one day, I'd love to write a post like this. You've echoed my thoughts and obviously that of many others :)

    I'll be the devil's advocate here and I'll tell you how I came around to dealing with it. It wasn't until I started blogging that I realized the amount of effort that goes into food blogging. Esp. if you want to have nice pictures, a correct / original recipe and step by step photos.
    I feel there is nothing wrong in being positive when commenting on others blog as long as it is honest and sincere - just like you would do when you meet someone in real life. Aren't we polite to ppl around us in real life? Smile at them, say something nice (though honest) or say nothing at all. Defn so if we don't know them well enough.
    I do not believe in flattering for no reason but there's a lot of ppl putting so much effort into their blog, so much talent out there in terms of recipe creation or photography or both. And they are doing it for no $ returns. It's worth applauding - we are teaching (and learning in the process) a generation of home cooks out there:-)

    I do feel though that once you have established a certain 'friendly relationship' with a blogger, you can be more honest, direct and give constructive criticism. I would prefer to do that through email or a private msg rather than a public forum. Coz the idea is to put the point across (give constructive feedback in this case) rather than undermine the person's efforts publicly.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're absolutely right on a lot of things.
      a) I also believe that freedom of speech doesn't mean abusing it.
      b) I may have appeared cruel in this post, but I understand one cannot go around giving unwanted advice or insult people, anywhere.
      c) Apart from being good to people in blog world or real world, each blog is the blogger's own space and has the authority to do whatever he/she wants on the blog. Just as no one's to judge how someone keeps their home.
      d) Just like you when I realized how much work goes into each post since I started blogging without making any money out of it, I began appreciating other people's creativity, willingness to share and efforts too.

      So amidst my annoyance with false flattery, purposeless praises, and some unbearable blogs - I either don't visit them or don't comment what I don't like. But all this that has been at the back of my mind, I thought had to go out in the open (not many would dare to be as blunt & rude as I would :P), so at least some people would get the indirect message or at least if it helps becoming better?

      I must say I loved the Devil's Advocate's comment :)

      Delete
  20. Few months back there was this girl who would leave the same comment again and again on my posts. After receiving it three times in a row, i felt insulted because even though she was saying nice words .. it didn't feel real at all. I could have ignored but instead I dropped her a email asking why ? In response, she said that she doesn't have time and so she copy paste .. I LOL ROFLOL.... on her modesty. She said, people return comments in her blog. I gave some piece of gyan and told her how it would effect eventually like it did to me. For the next few post she started writing different stuff and then she was back to square one.
    I think there are different type of bloggers. Some who doesn't care for anything but traffic and comments and some who are passionate who doesn't care for anything but sharing what they like or do or cooked and there are others who does great job, maintains integrity and does give constructive criticism.
    This blogging world is too huge sweetie and it won't change but we can .. and we can be honest. If I don't like something.. i don't say. It's better not to say anything than to be rude i guess :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Your comment really brought sunshine and smile :D
      That was hilarious! You were too nice to give her some gyan.
      And you're right about the different types of bloggers. Gradually I've realized the categories and those that are worth following and commenting.
      Yeah, I guess the blog world will never change, not even with rant posts like these. Damn. :P

      Delete
  21. I just started blogging.....i too feel the same as you....thanks for sharing...honestly

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Welcome to this part of the world.

      Delete
  22. Well, honestly I don't see the problem with close up shots or blurred photos. I had lots of those when I started blogging. Everyone starts somewhere and for some blogging is a way to just let what's inside of you out. Its not a way to become a photographer or a writer. Just a medium to let out their creativity out in any form. So as a result there is a lot of rambling and talking about the weather (because for some that's all what their life is about at that time), they just want someone to share it with, even if that someone is not reading it. But that one comment- that one positive comment is an encouragement that there is somebody who stopped by on their space and notices what they have to say. It might be a false praise, but it makes a person happy and I think like a white lie, it can help make someone's day. Constructive criticism is great too, but not everyone takes it in the correct spirit. If I pass along a blog whose photo I might not like, I just talk about the recipe and its idea (and then the picture doesnt seem too bad), or maybe something she or he had to say. I do agree some people just leave a comment to get traffic to their blog, and that is a little sad- but it's ok. It's their way to get someone to notice them. I guess we are all just looking for some attention. That's why we blog! Else we would have a personal diary.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Loved the last part, can almost use it as a quote :D

      The problem is not with bad pics - the problem is bad comments. I still take terrible pictures. And even when I publish them, my common sense knows they're blurry, or too zoomed in, or clicked using flash, or just plain bad - but when people write "nice pictures; amazing clicks" unnecessarily, it ticks me off. Whether on my pictures or anyone else's. And in my head I go like, great picture? Seriously?? Why not just NOT say anything about it than say something for the heck of it? OR why not just talk about something else, like you do? But some people just don't get it!

      But yeah, like I mentioned in the post - I've realized how writing positive things positively affects the positivity in me too :D

      Thanks for the comment, Shumaila!

      Delete
    2. Probably I am being defensive here, because I too have commented on pictures that might not fit the whole criteria of a "good picture" and I comment "wow that looks good". Because for me if something "sounds" good, it looks good too. Also, if I see that someone's picture has improved from the previous ones they had been clicking, I do comment that's a great photograph. That was the kind of encouragement that helped me improve my photography, so if it helped me I feel the encouragement could help someone else too. So even though the picture might be blurry, out of focus, or too bright the quality of the photograph has improved. And maybe that's why a person might comment so. I have comments on my blog on my previous posts with people commenting that's a really nice click. And this was when I was still shooting with a point and shoot and they were just about average in terms of a great shot. But at the time I too honestly found them better than the previous photos I had been clicking. My photos had improved and somebody else agreed. So when I read those comments I did not think of them as false praise but genuine appreciation. Of course sometimes leaving a comment we kind of over exaggerate things- or due to a lack of knowledge of other adjectives use "nice", "amazing", "awesome" and maybe that's why it might sound fake to some.

      I don't know, but if I come across someone's blog, I would rather say something than not say anything at all. It is nice to know that someone came across your blog. If I don't find the most recent post interesting I search the archives to find something interesting and leave a comment on that.


      I do agree some people just don't even mean what they say and just copy and paste comments. That definitely can be irritating. Fortunately I have not noticed it or maybe I just get too excited when I get a comment that I don't want to notice. Haha. Or maybe I am just naive and give too much credit to some people. And maybe I need to be a little worldly wise!

      As for meaningful comments, I do agree they are the best and when you get them they make your day. Earlier, it would get to me a little when someone would just comment what a great post without even reading the post. But then I figured, I write for myself and sometimes I can ramble a lot. So can I blame a person for not going through the entire post. No. I can be pointlessly boring in my posts and that's why I have photographs. Those who don't want to read can just look at the photographs or go straight to the recipe. Everybody is on a different schedule and have different preferences for the kind of writing they like reading. The fact that something brought them to my space and they took out the time to comment is now fine by me. Of course it feels better when they have something meaningful to say, but sometimes all you have time to say is that looks great and this comment could be even after someone has read the whole post.

      (I do realise Nisha that you are not directing this ranting at me because I like to think I do leave meaningful comments when I do. But maybe my justification might make it sound like that I think that. The only reason I am justifying is because sometimes that "amazing click" or "wow that looks amazing" might actually be genuine even if it sounds fake!)

      Anywhoooo...keep blogging and keep such posts coming. They are good food for thought. :)
      And also keep ranting, it helps to take the frustration out! Plus, we enjoy such posts!

      Delete
    3. Arre baap re, main toh darr gayi. Another post under a post :D
      On a serious note, I loved reading your thoughts. First, I must clarify that none of the rants were directed to you; I sincerely love your photography & styling. Second, I'm actually thinking I should write more non-recipe posts - at least I get to have discussions! :D

      I do believe that compliments and positive words do make the giver and the receiver feel good and inspire to become better. But I must add that from my silly pictures from starting stage to a little better me today has not been because of the comments/compliments, but because I observed better photographers' works and learned on my own to improve myself. Had I been under the influence of "wow" comments, I probably would have been on the same level instead of growing. Then again, that's just me.

      And you know what? A mean me, and a sweet you - I think we'd make great friends :D

      Delete
    4. I really do need to get a life. That was a long reply! I just saw it and I was like woah! I can really write a lot! Another example of my pointless rambling that I mentioned above! :) Haha, it is as you put it another post under a post! Sorry for hogging your space with so many of my words! I think I am too vela! And don't worry I do know that none of the rants were directed to me, I just thought maybe we could give people more credit of actually being nice. It helps in not getting frustrated all the time. It has definitely helped me, and like you said it has helped you too!

      And yes I agree that the improvement in photography are your efforts. But the encouragement, for me, surely helped. And yes you should write more non-recipe posts. These are fun. Next time though I will keep my replies shorter. :)

      Delete
    5. Don't be sorry at all. By now you (and others :P) very well know the kind of comments I love reading, so they're totally acceptable and more than welcome in my space :)

      Delete
  23. appreciate you being honest. i guess it's a personal choice how someone wants to run their blog etc, i'd rather say something positive coz any effort is good. i comment only when i mean it, not to get comments in return. i try to leave thoughtful comments. i never hesitate to go to an old post & comment. i don't differentiate between good or bad pics, coz it feels rude to do so. maybe they don't know they can post better pics, don't have the time or a good camera etc
    yes many comment only with the intention to promote their blog, events, giveaways & it's sad to see such comments. in fact i've had few bloggers insist that i follow them back & they ordered me more than twice. i ignored it. when i follow someone i don't expect a follow in return whether its twitter, blogger etc
    for many blogs only traffic, followers & promotion matters. some things are fake in blogging world....but some of us can make a difference & be honest
    i've seen blogposts with zero comments and i think that's fine :) not necessary there has to be a comment....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't understand when bloggers comment 'nice space, visit mine, etc etc' - if they leave a smart comment, not just me but every other reader would visit them! And despite me clearly writing not to leave links or event notices in comments, some bloggers still don't read the fine print! So, just like you rightly said it's a personal choice how someone wants to run their blog, I choose to either delete or not respond to certain comments. Because I don't want crap in my space. There, I said it. (what suddenly happened to the nicer me?! :P)

      And yes! When I wrote about the life & death part of having comment on every post - it was exactly what your last line meant. You said it in a nicer way :D

      Thanks for your comment, Shruti, appreciated! :)

      Delete
  24. great post Nisha. Loved it, made me laugh. lOl.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Well Done Nisha !! A very honest and blunt post indeed ;)

    Wonder it has taken out the thoughts from everyone's mind and there started the confession time. My take would not be much different from all of the above, in fact have done that myself (even tried that Give-away Charm once :P ) and am better off now with no comments rather than the fake ones. Yes, I would feel bad if there is nobody to appreciate, and that is just a minor reason why I also visit everyone's place. But the honest reason stands, I do want to learn from them and try different recipes !!

    There is a Lady in this blogosphere who is very active in her posts and her efforts and creativity with recipes is really appreciable. But she usually posted with smallest size pictures. I emailed her and asked her to increase the size of her pictures with a good intention of making her space more attractive and I really did think I am doing some good job. Am no Pro myself, but I still do like her pictures taken from a normal PnS camera. She never replied back and stopped commenting and visiting my space. I am so reluctant to leave honest comments now for all and everyone but only the people I actually know and share cordial relationship.

    May be, it depends on the motive behind your blogging. Like, do you want to earn with ads in future and hence all this attention seeking activities. Or you really want to learn and make some friends across. Or you actually want to make in this virtual world.. Just the thoughts..

    Anywhosss.. you have surely attracted a lot of light through this post Girl ;)

    ReplyDelete
  26. love ur post... i do have a blog and it's only to keep me sane... :) sometimes you need to type aimlessly to get out the negative energy in you... and the only time i comment on blogs is if i try out their recipes... i was surprised when i got a comment back from a particular blogger that it was the first time somebody had tried what they had posted!!! i was seriously surprised... i actually took to blogging to learn cooking, and thanks to a number of good ones, i've two files full of recipes for trial :) and i make it a point to go back and tell them that i'm grateful... that includes if i go wrong or i made some adjustments... i feel that better than sugaring up your image, it is better to keep quite and only comment when necessary... :)

    ReplyDelete
  27. My gosh, itna Spusht!!! Landed here from Maayeka. Actually wanted to say a lot but seeing that a lot has been said I decided not to add any more. I started blogging in May 2012 and soon realised that it is like stepping into your in-laws home for the first time. You smile, say good things and pretend to like everything because you want them to like you...;) It was a task for me to keep my mouth shut as Sarcasm is my middle name (even when once a beautiful handicraft was photographed in front of a chappal stand LOL) and I must say blogging has made me a nicer person too! Soon realised that all the awards, events, giveaways, followers, comments are so pointless and decided to stick to my original purpose of putting my artwork out there in public. Lo, na na karke kitna likh diya. :) Enjoyed reading your blog and feel free NOT to visit me...haha.
    Regards

    ReplyDelete

Feel free to drop your comments - opinion, ideas, correction, suggestion, related memories, discussions or questions - anything that makes me & this blog better or helps you & others is welcome!

SPAM MESSAGES, ADVERTISEMENTS, AND COMMENTS WITH LINKS TO YOUR BLOG & EVENTS WILL BE DELETED.
Please keep the space clean, keep it SPUSHT! ;)

I can also be reached here if you want to write me a quick message. And hey, thanks for dropping by! :)

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...